1.28.2013

a semi-autobiography in eight parts.

I. You write him a postcard. "I don't know how to tell you but I'm finally letting go," it says. The postcard is from Paris and when you finish writing it, you slide it back into the drawer with all the other words you never said. You ask your empty hands if this means you are letting go. Everyone memorizes the backs of their hands, but you'll never know your own as well as you know the scar like a poem permanent on his thumb.

II. You like tea more than coffee but you drink coffee because on days when you relent to a cup of tea you become afraid that you're turning into your mother. You drink it anyways and remember the best moments of childhood.

III. At night you run your fingertips across your ribcage and wonder about all the words that don't live there yet. You're bad at commitments but sometimes when you read Mary Oliver you sigh in relief. These are words that could rest on your ribs forever.

IV. You grow playlists slowly on your computer, choosing the songs carefully. You're trying to bring that feeling back with the music. Maybe nostalgia is the closest you'll ever get.

V. You told her once that you were bad at goodbyes. All this time later, and it's still true.

VI. You type fast, "maybe someday," and hit send.

VII. You ask your hands again what it means to let go.

VIII. The tea water is boiling. Your hands still don't answer.

18 comments:

  1. this is...wow. I love this. It's gorgeous. 'These are words that could rest on your ribs forever.'

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  2. your words always get me. Every word is just so true, and written so well. It all honesty...well, I can't explain it.

    it leaves me speechless.

    to say the least, your one of my favorite writers.

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  3. OH MY WORD, KATIE, you've done it again: my heart started pumping far too fast after reading this.

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  4. Wow. This is so beautiful & powerful. I love this a lot.

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  5. I know this is bad literary manners but I really want to hear the rest of this.

    anaruizwriting.blogspot.com

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  6. <3 your words are beautiful. This is lovely.

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  7. i need to cry. this describes me bunches.

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  8. You're incredible, Katie. Seriously.

    "You're trying to bring that feeling back with the music. Maybe nostalgia is the closest you'll ever get."

    Perfection!

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  9. This is beautiful.

    I don't normally comment, but this. Is. Beautiful. So moving, and so perfect.

    Thank you.

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  10. Writing is your calling, girl.

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  11. this evoked something in me that I can't identify. but I think it's safe to say that I will be thinking about this post for the rest of the day.

    in other words, I love it.

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  12. WOW. just wow. breathtaking.

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  13. wow...this is just deep. i love it.

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  15. wow. This is amazing. It evoked emotion and pictures in my mind. It's perfection.
    "These are words that could rest on your ribs forever."
    yes, they could.
    Tessa Brooke

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